GREAT BROGMOID
The planet of
Zork is
supported on the shoulder and upper back of one of many Great
Brogmoids, and this
particular Great Brogmoid keeps us from falling into the
Great Void.
And
far below, its feet rested upon another world of things so incredible
and dangerous that few have returned in even a sane enough state to
faithfully describe what they had seen. Not only is Zork supported by
one of these Great Brogmoids, but the feet of another rests upon Zork
itself -- one foot stablized upon the top of
Mount Foobia, while the
other possibly upon
Mount Matter-horn -- who supports one of the other
worlds upon its own shoulders.
Though
fairly ordinary for a brogmoid, a rough estimate
puts these creatures at a zillion times larger than any ever
seen
on the surface of Zork -- tremendous beyond description. The mere
shoulder hairs are like mighty trees; the pores like deep craters. As
the
First Dungeon Master discovered, the thickness of the hair-trees
provided an opportunity to climb up the neck to an ear, whose
wide-channel was blocked by a virtual forest of ear fungi, and further
inside, by the eardrum itself. The membrane of the eardrum is tougher
than most walls. And even though inside the interior of the ear, the
brogmoid could no more hear the shouting of a human than a human could
hear the shouting of a bacterium.
A majority of the shakings, known as
Zorkquakes,
are caused by the restlessness of the Great Brogmoid that holds up our
world.
HISTORY
According
to the
Scrolls of Kar'nai, when the rudiments of the universe
containing Zork was manifested,
Eru the true God who rules the
Timeless
Halls, conceived from his own belly, the Great Brogmoids to hold up
each of the planets created by the
Implementors--each supports one
world upon his shoulders to keep it from
falling into the Great Void, while each Brogmoid itself stands secure
atop of another world below.
BROGMOLITHIC VOLCANO EPOZZ
Some speculate that the
Brogmolithic Volcano Epozz was named after an unknown event related
to the Great Brogmoid.
BROGMOIDISM &
ZORKQUAKES
The tenets of the religion of
Brogmoidism originated sometime during
the
fourth century
GUE. Before its founding, many, especially the followers
of Eru, believed that the world is supported on the shoulder
and upper back
of a
Great Brogmoid and that this Great Brogmoid keeps us from falling
into the Great Void. But this cult was composed of those who delved
into tremendous error--those who delved into idolatry by worshipping
the mammoth beast itself. (Today, however, the term Brogmoidism is used
interchangeably to identify both
those who believe in the existance of the Great Brogmoids, as well as
the cult
of Brogmoidists who worship and revere the creature.)
With the popularity of the Brogmoidist faith rising since the beginning
of the
fourth century GUE, the devout
Brogmoidists were growing restless to
worship it. Although no one knew how it could be reached, many embarked
on pilgrimages in attempts to see it at the bottom of the world. All
were in vain.
In the days before the close of the fourth
century, these words, along with the advent of
Belegur,
were fulfilled:
How will you recognize the
arrival of the evil one? I tell you now that
three warnings will be given to mark the coming of this fallen angel.
Even the great towers of the world will tremble in fear of his arrival,
and the ground will quake. This is followed by the illness of an aged
king. As the realm stands leaderless, no one gives the orders to face
the invaders from a distant land. When these three signs have come to
pass, be on guard, for he will seek possession of your soul.
-The Seventh Scroll of
Kar’nai, Book Twelve
For in the Great Brogmoid that held up this world grew
sporadically restless. And by the time the year 398 GUE drew near, it
shook the world nearly half a dozen times within several
weeks, a sign of the great changes to come. Many among the
Mareilon
populace were left homeless and in terrible debt by his destructive
movements. A relief agency was formed solely to find those who were
facing the worst of those difficulties, confiscate their property, sell
its assets for the city’s profit, and then slam the victims into
debtor’s prison. This was only one more burning cause for a revolution
that was slowly cresting above the horizon.
The Scrolls of Kar'nai began to take on a very real meaning. The
fallen Implementor meddling in human affairs (
Belegur). Quaking of the
zork's
crust. Civil unrest (
Zarfil and his followers). Mysterious invaders
from a long-forgotten empire (the
Nezgeth).
And most compelling of all, the sudden illness of an aged king (
Zylon
the Aged). The
Great Brogmoid had given the first sign, shaking the world in warning
of the events to come.
OPPOSITION FROM THE
PLANETARY MODEL
For
many generations, the Scrolls of Kar'nai were held authoritive and
there was a general concenses amongst all the Zorkians that the great
brogmoids were real, despite that there were no records or reports of
anyone having actually seen one. Many took pilgrimmages to discover
them, but all were without success. Thus, with no evidence of their
existence, and no records anywhere of eye-witness accounts, both the
Great Brogmoids and the Scrolls of Kar'nai (which contained the
traditions regarding the brogmoids) fell into heavy disrepute. And
thus,other vulgar theories were aroused.
The primary emnity against the Brogmoid was the
Planetary Model,
which
had already been in existence
in its primitive form prior to the formation Brogmoidism, and had long
been contentious with those who merely believed in the existence of the
Great Brogmoid. But the more complex planetary model involved multiple
revolving planets and other celestial bodies.
While those who
believe in the existence of the Great Brogmoids (including Brogmoidists
and those who worship Eru) do not deny the existence of other planets,
others have elaborated by believing each of these celestial boides to
be held up by a series of brogmoids. This sequence of
alternating brogmoids and planes exactly parallels basic dimensional
physics if it is hypothesized that the first brogmoid stands upon the
plane held up by the last brogmoid (forming a massive “daisy-chain”, or
circle of bodies).
Still others have speculated less conservative approaches, including
that the apparent movement of each of the planets around the sun is due
to the perambulations of the brogmoids holding each of them up from one
massive central plane below that supports all eight. The one holding up
the sun is especially stoic. The moon was not found to be detailed in
this hypothesis.
THE YORUK CONTRAVERSY
By 425 GUE, the Books of
Yoruk were completed; their pages
filled
with many dark revelations. While they are most often cited as the
source of the Great Brogmoid theory, one of the great many things he
learned under the
Devil’s tutelage, this is pure deception, as it is a
well-known fact that the Great Brogmoid had been known about even
before the beginning of the Kingdom of
Quendor. Because of this, the
Brogmoidists, in particular, hotly denied the truth of these stories,
fearing that the tale of Yoruk contradicted the
fundamentals of their religion. However, the modern historical
community seems to have reached a general
consensus that, while details of the story might have been changed over
the centuries, the bulk of the legends surrounding Saint Yoruk are in
fact historically accurate.
"ON THE HORRIBLE FLATNESS
OF THE WORLD"
In his crucial “On the Horrible Flatness of the
World”,
Bizboz proved once and for all that the world was not
in fact spherical
but was instead nothing more than a round, flat disc. This work, when
published in 468 GUE, put
Bizboz in great trouble with the Brogmoidist Church, until Bizboz
pointed out that a flat world would actually be easier for the Great
Brogmoid to hold, allowing him to take a break and stretch his arms
without the world simply rolling off his head.
THE GREAT BROGMOID
CRITICIZED BY ZORBIUS BLATTUS
The Brogmoid
Hypothesis was exposed to much ridicule by detractors,
particularly by
Zorbius Blattus, a great philosopher from
the ninth century GUE. As a popular debunker of Brogmoidism, he was
often
asked, "If a giant Brogmoid were holding up the world, where would he
stand?" Because of the prevalence of questions such as these,
Brogmoidism lost most of its adherents by the ninth century GUE, in favor
of the
Planetary Model, or either the
Turtle Theorgy, the
Troll Postulate
(although
no scholar today seriously considers either of the latter).
Blattus' argument, while philosophically sound, does have one flaw:
he is completely and one hundred percent wrong. On
Curse Day of 883
GUE, the unknown man who would later become the
First
Dungeon Master explored the depths of the caverns beneath
Flatheadia
(which could not be passed through until the grues were cleared on the
day), and
actually came out on the underside of Zork, proving not only that the
world was flat, but also that it was in fact help up by a Great
Brogmoid that was tremendous beyond description. A rough estimate puts
this
Great Brogmoid at a zillion times larger than any brogmoid ever seen
before. Its mere shoulder hairs were like mighty trees. On the same day
as this remarkable discovery, he also hiked to the top of
Mount Foobia
and discovered the
foot of another Great Brogmoid. Apparently, not only does a brogmoid
hold up the world, but upon the world is standing another brogmoid,
which can only be presumed to support yet another world.
Chroniclers of history have always been puzzled by the fact that the
Brogmoid Hypothesis has traditionally been given less credit than the
so-called Turtle Theory, and the Troll Postulate, both of which were
the subject of some research by
Leonardo Flathead.
THE GREAT BROGMOID TODAY
Despite
all the evidence in
support of the authenticity of Scrolls of Kar’nai and that the Great
Brogmoids
themselves may
be seen on display at their respective locations today, there are still
those
who would adamantly remain skeptics and instead cling to the Planetary
Model,
which arose from questions such as, “If there really were a brogmoid
holding up
a world above ours, where is its shadow when the sun passes by?”, and,
“On
which surface does the bottommost brogmoid stand?”
A
more modern outright denier of the Great
Brogmoids, wishing to foolishly and stubbornly disprove anything with
even the
most minute semblance to the holy writings, actually went down the
tunnels
beneath the world. There this professor truthfully stated, “I see
nothing here
that would prompt me to believe that a brogmoid of any size was in any
way
holding up this planet, nor do I see anything that would even stimulate
a
question of doubt in my mind that Zork is spherical. Here I stand and
deny
those deceitful writings of Kar’nai.” But what he did not tell those of
the
planetary school of thought was that prior to gazing out of the mouth
of the
tunnel, he had purposefully closed his eyes, and when he emerged, set
his back
to the obvious brogmoid standing before him.
THE FINAL CONFLAGRATION
The few researchers brave enough to travel ahead as far as 3800 GUE
have reported a devastated and ruined landscape. All chronicles
referring to this desolate era have called it the
Final Conflagration,
a deliberate reference to various ancient prophecies that predict all
kinds of zorkquakes and fires on the day that the Great Brogmoid
finally lies down to sleep. Although most brogmoidists throughout
history have been hesitant to predict an exact date for this event,
claiming that doing so infringes upon the freewill of the great being,
the best guesses of
temporal scholars have placed the date at some
point immediately before 3800.
TRIVIA:
In
883 GUE, there was a large family of fungi living within the eardrum of
the Great Brogmoid that supports Zork upon its shoulder and upper back,
these included
Barnaby,
Seymour,
Sherman,
Irving,
Sammy,
Myron,
Boris,
Melvin,
Lester,
Julius,
Ricardo, and
Omar.