FROBOZZ MAGIC WIZARD ESCAPE POTIONFrobozz Magic Wizard Escape Potions are ideal for escaping from any wizard under any conditions. They came with an iron-clad money-back guarantee. Unfortunately, the amount of legal paperwork required to harness the effects of this potion led many to avoid using it. See the following theoritical example of what would have happened had Bivotar and Juranda used the potion to escape from Malifestro's lair:
After
a moment, there is a loud pop, and a gnome appears. He is dressed in a
three-piece suit, and carries a thick briefcase. He approaches the elves and
the adventurers.
"I
am a representative of the Frobozz Magic Wizard Escape Potion Company. I am
here to insure that your escape is fast, safe, and legally correct. Now, what is
your intended destination?"
"The
castle of Syovar," says Bivotar.
The
gnome gets a listing from his briefcase.
"Hmmm.
Can't find that on my list. Could you possibly mean the Castle of Zork?"
"Yes,
that's it," says Max. "Hurry!"
"Patience,"
says the gnome. "Ninety-five percent of all litigation is caused by undue
haste. Now, I must have the name of the wizard you wish to escape from."
"Malifestro,"
says Juranda.
"Is
that one 'L' or two?"
"One!"
yells Fred.
"And
your names?" asks the gnome, scribbling furiously on a legal pad.
Bivotar
tells the gnome their names. The elves fidget nervously. The demon laughs at
their discomfort.
"Now,
you must sign these release forms, clearing the company from any future
obligations other than the exact escape in question. You must sign all seven
copies in the thirteen places indicated."
Suddenly,
there is a huge puff of black smoke at the other end of the room. A tall figure
wearing black, flowing robes steps from the cloud of smoke.
"It's
Malifestro!" cry the elves, diving for cover.
"I'm
afraid the guarantee is void without your signatures," says the gnome,
disappearing with a pop.