ELVIS FLATHEAD

The origins of the GUE's rock music can be traced to the legendary singer Elvis Flathead, whose first concert in 841 GUE propelled him to stardom. For years following this public debut, fans would flock to see “the King” sway back and forth to smash hits such as "Love is Blind," and "Hellhound," as in "You Ain’t Nothing But a Hellhound," both the highlights of his career. He also once sang "You can't get Coconuts for nothin'." Elvis' had one daughter, the famous Leeza Flathead. The date of death of this great singer is unknown, but had certainly passed away from 949.

Despite that Elvis seems to have been unknown prior to his first concert, this did not stop Dimwit Flathead from being well aware of his music around 789 GUE. Historians believe this knowledge may have come about due to the king's excessive undertakings of the time tunnels in the 770s. Others believe that Elvis Flathead had but a small cult following until his concert, while others still consider the following account portraying Dimwit's knowledge of Elvis to be purely fiction:

Flathead’s man had a mission to protect Lord Dimwit from the riotous residents of the Fublio Valley, who opposed the giant statue his Royal Excessively Highness was constructing at the expense of their neighborhood. Flathead’s men were told to memorize the last line of the popular Zorkian anthem, “You Ain’t Nothin’ But a Hellhound.” This signal would distinguish Flathead’s undercover men from the local marauders. But—everyone forgets a code now and then—and when it came right down to swordpoint—who knows the last line to that song, anyways? With his men stammering, “You ain’t nothin’ but a Hellhound,” which is the first line, rather than, “You ain’t no friend of mine,” which is indeed the last, Lord Dimwit lost 3,000 of his best men, and vowed to make Elvis Flathead required listening for his troops in the future.

Naturally, Elvis imitators abound, and those aspiring stars who cannot sing quite as well as Elvis did can be found in Borphee every winter, at The From Bad to Worst Songfest.